In the late 70's, when Thomas wrapped his loving arms around me for the first time, I felt like I was home. This was very strange
because I was in love with someone else at the time! As I look back, I realize that it was a sign from the Fates and an accurate
omen of things to come. We had many good times together back then, but in 1980 he left some of his personal belongings with
me and took an airplane to New York to live a different life. Ten years later, when I had 7 years in recovery, he called me from
out of the blue to "check in" and it wasn't long before he was standing on my doorstep once again. --- Tom and I reunited on
New Years Eve,1990, never to be parted again. We had many good times through the years as well as rocky ones, but one
thing for sure. We learned what real love and tolerance was all about. T and I were the best of friends as well as soul mates.
He loved me exactly as I was, which is very hard to do. In fact, sometimes I think he knew me better than I knew myself, and his
perception, persistence, loyalty and gentle manners were great gifts in my life. His deep abiding love and devotion gave me the
courage to be more, not less, than I am. He didn't want to change me. He only wanted to make things better and he did. Thomas
was the wind beneath my wings, always encouraging me to trust my heart and follow my dreams. He was not intimidated by my
feminist spirit or independence. He was strong, sexy, traditional and trustworthy, obnoxious, eccentric, funny and wild, sensual
and kind, and we both worked very hard to earn each other's trust, devotion and respect as friends as well as a couple. I loved T
with all my heart and I'm grateful that we were blessed to be in each other's lives for 35 yrs. For two old addict-alcoholics, that is
quite an accomplishment. Yes, I still miss him very much, and there are times I deeply mourn and miss his physical presence, but
his loving, protective spirit still lingers close by to bring me comfort & encouragement when I need it most. ~ JoAnna Ells-Medina ~
|- Mother -
Barbara Ensign Ells
|Father - John Von Haff
Step-Father - Richard Ells
Rod, Julie, J.T.
Christina... Mariah... Savannah..
|The Dance is Over
I didn't think the dance would end
When life was full and sweet
When demons had been conquered
and healing was complete...
When all concerns were put to rest
with nowhere else to roam
when aging found us side by side
and laughter filled our home
I didn't think our dance would end
when spring had just begun
When all the lilacs were in bloom
and winter snows were done
when darker skies had disappeared
and mating birds were singing
when sunlight warmed our skin at last
and eyes were bright & gleaming..
We knew the day would finally come
when we would say goodbye
We dreaded it with heavy hearts
as many tears were cried...
But knowing we would meet again
in another time and place
You left this realm with one last sigh
and peace upon your face
For now the dance is over
and I must walk alone
But I'll take time to reminisce
about all we said and done...
Your spirit's always near me
and our sweet love lingers on
Assuring we will dance again
in another time to come....
Forever yours.... Jo Jo
|Thomas D. Ells
Thomas was born in San Mateo California on
January 5, 1947 to Barbara Ensign & John Von Hoff.
He grew up in the hills of Los Gatos, then Campbell,
with great-grandparents & elders all around him.
He was the eldest child with 3 brothers and 1sister,
Jeff, Chris, Cynthia and Randy. Tom's dad, John,
passed away when Thomas was only 4 years old,
so his mother remarried Richard Ells, Randy's father,
who became a positive father figure in Tom's life.
Dick taught Thomas to be kind and gentle as well
as devoted and responsible so Tom took Dick's last
name in his youth & had many fond memories of him.
Thomas went to Camden and Los Gatos High School.
He was also influenced in his youth by his grandfather and
his uncle Lou, who taught him the construction business;
but the one he cherished most was his loving maternal
grandmother, Florence, to whom he was deeply devoted
and who became his guardian spirit throughout his lifetime.
Thomas was an old soul and wise spirit. He was one with
Mother Nature and was most at home in the mountains.
He loved rock'n roll and country music, especially when
he was drinking and creating projects in his workshop.
Thomas was also a very talented carpenter, plumber and
craftsman who had a gentle voice and gift for singing.
He was a friend and a lover of women and children and
preferred spending his time with them because he said
they were "genuine and always came from the heart. "
Thomas was a realist and basically a loner by nature, but
he did a bit of traveling and lived in many different US cities
during his lifetime. He was also a highly sensitive and
intuitive man who started drinking and drugging early in life
to alter his consciousness and cope with the pain of living
in a dysfunction world which he detested with a passion.
Although he was sober for the last 5 years of his life,
his continual struggle with alcoholism and addiction
eventually resulted in his early death from cirrhosis.
Thomas married 6 times in his life and had many lovers
before settling down for good with his beloved soul mate.
JoAnna and Thomas were introduced in 1978 by Davina's
father and became fast and loyal friends. They dated
and hung out together frequently until 1980 when the
circumstances of life took them both in different directions.
But, in 1990, Thomas showed up on JoAnna's doorstep to
re-kindle their friendship, love, and passion once again.
It was then that they entered into a marriage of the heart
becoming committed & devoted mates never to part again.
They lived together in love and trust until high noon,
May 2, 2011, when Thomas took his last breath.
JoAnna and Davina were by his side until the end.
Thomas is survived by his 3 children, Rodney,
Julia and Johnathan Thomas; his grandchildren
Christina, Mariah, Samantha, Mikey and Chelsea
& Jo's children, Johanna, Davina, Rick & Jerry.
He was 64 years old at the time of his death
and he is greatly missed by all who loved him.
I never expected the love that existed
to bloom when all hoping had gone,
The times that we shared in fun long ago
had ended & scattered before we begun;
I faced my fears & heard through the years
that I could be destined for better...
But all that remained was a heart full of pain
and a box full of tattered love letters...
But the Fates did replace our union with grace
and the friendship we shared in our youth,
And what a surprise when you came to my door
and opened your heart with the truth;
At first it was shocking and hard to believe
that you followed your visions to find me,
but we took the chance and started our dance
and now we have years that are binding...
It's been quite a journey between you and I
with plenty to say between cuddles,
I wouldn't erase the love we embraced
that sustained us thru hardship & struggles...
You turned out to be my hearts destiny
with times full of laughter and pleasure,
And I wouldn't trade the life that we made
For you're truly the man that I treasure....
Love Jo, 1998
|Tom's Family - Friends - Early Years
|Friends & Family
|Thomas' favorite expressions about life were: "What a mess!".... " What a Hose Job!"...&... " Hosed Again!"
He said...."When you get up in the morning... grab your ankles and prepare yourself for another Hose Job.
If it doesn't come, for one reason or another, then you can say you had a pretty good day!"
|Relaxing in the "CAVE"
|T's Many Faces with those whom he shared his Life
|Goodbye Old Friend!
|Having Fun with the Children
|Our Final Days Together
|Beltane Gathering & Tom's Memorial Circle, 2011
|We loved talking on the phone!
Others have touched me soft in the night
Others have kissed me and held me tight,
Good times and lovers, yes I've had a few
But I was just waiting for someone like you!
I have been lonely and I have been loved,
I've grown used to losing what I'm fondest of,
But now I see clearly that my whole life through
I was just waiting for someone like you!
I never wasted a minute of my time,
Cause every single road I took just led me to your side...
And now it seems funny that I never knew
I was just waiting for someone like you!
|I'll catch you all later!
|Welcome to my
|What a Mess!!!